Source: GettyA version of this story appeared in Total Annarchy, my fortnightly newsletter that helps you be a better writer, storyteller, marketer. Get it in your inbox; you’ll love it.
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Hi, bezzie.
A close friend had a birthday this week.
In gratitude for the texts and messages that modern birthdays serve up… she wrote on Instagram: “I have… a wonderful husband, sparkling kids, cherished friends, fulfilling career, Taylor Swift tics….”
(LOL on that last one. But also… I’m a little salty. Because I do not have Taylor Swift tickets.)
My friend ended with “I matter to the world I have created for myself.”
I loved that subtle reframing.
What do we have in the world we’ve created for ourselves?
It’s Thanksgiving week here in the U.S., a time of gratitude and reflection. I suppose that’s why this issue is a little more introspective than most.
This issue is also less prescriptive with the writing and marketing advice. (Our regularly scheduled programming will return in Total Annarchy #126.)
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My birthday friend is using “gratitude tense,” a made-up grammatical construction that challenges us to begin a sentence with “I have…” in place of “I am grateful for…”
Around this time every year, I bump into a reference to “gratitude tense” in my wandering around the internet. (Most recently, via Austin Kleon.)
“Gratitude tense” is also stronger writing.
It’s a way to ditch a weak “thinking” verb “am” in favor of bold “action” verb “have.” I talk about this in the brand-new edition of Everybody Writes. (Also on Bookshop.org.)
“Thinking” verbs are scrawny weakling verbs like thinks, considers, knows, feels. The action is invisible because it happens inside a brain.
“Action” verbs describe actions you can more easily see in the world. One of my writing teachers used to say that “action” verbs are verbs that would hurt if you dropped them on your foot.
They paint a picture in the mind of a reader. But now I’m just mixing metaphors whoops.
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So this almost-year-end, paint your own picture.
Try a kind of counting exercise. You become the inventory control specialist, taking stock of what you have.
Shift the inert “I am grateful for…” into the active “I have…”
Gratitude is easier to feel when you can see it plain as day.
The petty grievances. The perceived slights. That negative remark. The fact that I had a frustrating week capped by not scoring Taylor tickets. Letting it all go.
I’m gonna try, anyway.
I hope your own inner inventory control manager ticks off lots of items in your stockroom.
And happy Thanksgiving to all of you who celebrate.
I’m grateful I have you here, reading this.